Overcoming a Rough Day

I find myself today, once again, wrestling.

It cannot be said enough:               

Ephesians 6:12 New King James Version (NKJV)
12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

The Holy Spirit has imparted upon me His wisdom, that is true heavenly wisdom and not earthly wisdom (James 3:13-18), such that I am entirely cognisant of the season in which I am in.

Not through reasoning, but by the power of revelation.

I have taken up my cross, and entered into a period of sacrifice, yet this knowledge does not prevent my struggles. For underlying this larger struggle, is a battle fought on more intimate grounds:

Galatians 5:17 New King James Version (NKJV)
17 For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.

So though I am cognisant of the season I am in, though I want to count it all joy for the trials (James 1:2) my flesh is incapable of such. My flesh remains wilfully in a place of anxiety, focused upon the temporal "truth" of my situation, not the eternal truth that God is in control.

Despite my best efforts, I cannot escape these thoughts.

Faith confessions to the contrary, seeking counsel and conversation have all added to my struggles. People draw from the well within me, at a time when I desperately trying to avoid running dry.

God is silent when I pray, for whatever reason, I am not hearing from Him. His outstretched hand seems to have pulled back from me. I am without direction when I read the Bible, not therefore just praying amiss, but reading amiss.

So why then am I writing this post? Regular readers would have heard enough of my struggles, and I am certainly sick of writing about them!

So far this is not encouraging, this is not edifying, so....why? Simple:

2 Corinthians 10:3-6 New King James Version (NKJV)
3 For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. 4 For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, 5 casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, 6 and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled.

See my anxious thoughts left alone would lead to my disobedience, going to work despite God telling me not to do so, taking matters into my own hands.

Thus, not surrendering to God's will.

So it may seem strange, but my service is a weapon. But why?

James 4:7 New King James Version (NKJV)
Humility Cures Worldliness
7 Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.

Because the devil is trying to bring me out of submission to God! If I am in God's presence, doing His will and His work, in His strength I can resist the devil and he will flee from me!

So instead I choose to draw closer to God that He may draw near to me (James 4:8), through this blog. For every anxious thought that is in my mind, telling me to stop, telling me to disobey, telling me to forsake God for He is keeping me a place of anguish; I defy those voices with my service.

If the enemy thought that they could disable me, I shall use this attack as fuel. The weapon formed against me to turn away from God, I instead turn to Him to frustrate the enemy, and further God's kingdom.

I will instead tell all who listen that God is in control, feeding the Spirit by doing the will of the Father (John 4:34), such that the internal battle is won in this day by the Spirit, that the flesh is brought into submission. Allowing me to access those fruits of the Spirit that well help me endure unto the promise: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).

I will submit to God, resist the devil such that he flees from me (James 4:8). Using the precise spiritual attack that the enemy sought to turn me away from God, thus not submitting to Him, I choose to use that to serve God. Glorifying God, that even such an attack can be used for my good, and in turn for whomever reads this post. I can assure you I feel much better writing this sentence, then the one at the beginning.

Brothers and sisters in Christ. Do not put God in a box, I am learning to draw closer, and experience, Him in several ways. One of your greatest weapons is to surely reconnect to the source? An all powerful eternal God, whom makes the demons tremble (James 2:19). Bring yourself into submission of His will for you and draw closer to Him. Do so in any way that you can.

This has helped me, and I pray that post helps you. Submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you (James 4:7). Do not entertain those thoughts in your head, do not engage, rebuke them! For every thought telling you to turn away from God, silence them and turn to Him.

As for me? Abraham endured unto his promise, so too shall I endure unto mine.

I have bad days, yet these bad days are set backs not defeat.

Christ already obtained the victory. Detractors may mock you, the enemy may get in a blow here or there, but it is written:

1 Kings 20:11 New King James Version (NKJV)
".....‘Let not the one who puts on his armor boast like the one who takes it off.’"


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