Overcoming a Rough Day

I find myself today, once again, wrestling.

It cannot be said enough:               

Ephesians 6:12 New King James Version (NKJV)
12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

The Holy Spirit has imparted upon me His wisdom, that is true heavenly wisdom and not earthly wisdom (James 3:13-18), such that I am entirely cognisant of the season in which I am in.

Not through reasoning, but by the power of revelation.

I have taken up my cross, and entered into a period of sacrifice, yet this knowledge does not prevent my struggles. For underlying this larger struggle, is a battle fought on more intimate grounds:

Galatians 5:17 New King James Version (NKJV)
17 For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.

So though I am cognisant of the season I am in, though I want to count it all joy for the trials (James 1:2) my flesh is incapable of such. My flesh remains wilfully in a place of anxiety, focused upon the temporal "truth" of my situation, not the eternal truth that God is in control.

Despite my best efforts, I cannot escape these thoughts.

Faith confessions to the contrary, seeking counsel and conversation have all added to my struggles. People draw from the well within me, at a time when I desperately trying to avoid running dry.

God is silent when I pray, for whatever reason, I am not hearing from Him. His outstretched hand seems to have pulled back from me. I am without direction when I read the Bible, not therefore just praying amiss, but reading amiss.

So why then am I writing this post? Regular readers would have heard enough of my struggles, and I am certainly sick of writing about them!

So far this is not encouraging, this is not edifying, so....why? Simple:

2 Corinthians 10:3-6 New King James Version (NKJV)
3 For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. 4 For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, 5 casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, 6 and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled.

See my anxious thoughts left alone would lead to my disobedience, going to work despite God telling me not to do so, taking matters into my own hands.

Thus, not surrendering to God's will.

So it may seem strange, but my service is a weapon. But why?

James 4:7 New King James Version (NKJV)
Humility Cures Worldliness
7 Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.

Because the devil is trying to bring me out of submission to God! If I am in God's presence, doing His will and His work, in His strength I can resist the devil and he will flee from me!

So instead I choose to draw closer to God that He may draw near to me (James 4:8), through this blog. For every anxious thought that is in my mind, telling me to stop, telling me to disobey, telling me to forsake God for He is keeping me a place of anguish; I defy those voices with my service.

If the enemy thought that they could disable me, I shall use this attack as fuel. The weapon formed against me to turn away from God, I instead turn to Him to frustrate the enemy, and further God's kingdom.

I will instead tell all who listen that God is in control, feeding the Spirit by doing the will of the Father (John 4:34), such that the internal battle is won in this day by the Spirit, that the flesh is brought into submission. Allowing me to access those fruits of the Spirit that well help me endure unto the promise: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).

I will submit to God, resist the devil such that he flees from me (James 4:8). Using the precise spiritual attack that the enemy sought to turn me away from God, thus not submitting to Him, I choose to use that to serve God. Glorifying God, that even such an attack can be used for my good, and in turn for whomever reads this post. I can assure you I feel much better writing this sentence, then the one at the beginning.

Brothers and sisters in Christ. Do not put God in a box, I am learning to draw closer, and experience, Him in several ways. One of your greatest weapons is to surely reconnect to the source? An all powerful eternal God, whom makes the demons tremble (James 2:19). Bring yourself into submission of His will for you and draw closer to Him. Do so in any way that you can.

This has helped me, and I pray that post helps you. Submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you (James 4:7). Do not entertain those thoughts in your head, do not engage, rebuke them! For every thought telling you to turn away from God, silence them and turn to Him.

As for me? Abraham endured unto his promise, so too shall I endure unto mine.

I have bad days, yet these bad days are set backs not defeat.

Christ already obtained the victory. Detractors may mock you, the enemy may get in a blow here or there, but it is written:

1 Kings 20:11 New King James Version (NKJV)
".....‘Let not the one who puts on his armor boast like the one who takes it off.’"


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A Covenant Through Sacrifice

Psalm 50:5 New King James Version (NKJV)

5 “Gather My saints together to Me,

Those who have made a covenant with Me by sacrifice.”

For those of you who do not know in this season of my life God has shown me a glorious and prosperous future, yet, has brought me to a complete to a standstill. My current circumstances do not communicate victory, nor that a future as bright as He promised is possible. Upon His instruction I am not working, I now have less money in my bank account than when I was a child, I face bills I cannot pay which seem to be increasing daily.
I am in the midst of spiritual battles and warfare, with painful revelation upon painful revelation because He has said "the truth shall make you free" (John 8:32), and despite all of this God has told me "be still, and know that I am God".

As many others I am sure, I had wrestled with the apparent notion that immediately I truly accepted Jesus as my Lord and savior of my soul, things seem to have gotten worse, and not better. I have scrambled looking to verse upon verse, of God's promises and despite my pleas, despite my prayers will all supplication and thanksgiving I am still in the midst of my troubles. 

Then, in the depths of my despair on the 20th May consumed by all that seemed to be against me, God brought me to a stand still with Psalms 50:5. (because of the opposition I faced in sharing this with you, it is only today, 3rd June, that I have composed and shared this with you all.).

I wrote at length about being saved, but not born again, these two things: the covenant through sacrifice and taking up your cross, are interwoven and so I direct you to my other post where I detailed this at length.

Struggle is often about perspective and understanding. My struggle was rooted in not being able to reconcile the multitude of places in the Bible whether its: Deuteronomy 28, Malachi 3:10, Jeremiah 29:11, Psalms 35:27 and so much more, saying God wants to prosper us and more so, he delights in doing so, with the fact that I am at my worst.

I was ecstatic when He shared with me a vision of my future, a prosperous one, yet I struggled with sorrow day to day. Why was this happening to me?

There are so many examples within the Bible of this exact thing happening. Did God not make David a king, yet look at all that he had to endure before he could access the promise: Saul tried to kill him relentlessly, he was in the wilderness and exile for a time, he had to reside in the land of the enemy, all his things were stolen, basically a civil war and so much more. Then there is Job, Abraham, Noah, Moses, Joshua and more recently we can even look to TD Jakes the experience he suffered in his "crushing".                     

In Psalms 50:5, God says that He establishes a covenant through sacrifice. This establishment of a covenant, or agreement, is effectively what allows us to benefit from the goodness of God:
Hebrews 11:17-18 New International Version (NIV)

17 By faith Abraham, when God tested him, offered Isaac as a sacrifice. He who had embraced the promises was about to sacrifice his one and only son, 18 even though God had said to him, “It is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned.
Abraham gained access to the promise through his sacrifice. Imagine his despair, this was his legitimate son, the son of promise whom God called his only son and yet God was asking him to allow him to die...(Here is a revelation from the Holy Spirit. Does this not sound like what God did for us when He allowed Jesus to die on a cross? This one moment kick started the redemption plan for all mankind, the lamb that was slain in substitution was Jesus in eternity (this may well be spiritual hard food! So if you do not believe then continue to seek God and test all things!!))

Such is the consistency of God, that through the Bible we we may test all things.

We establish a covenant with God through a spiritual crucifixion which is to die and be born again with Christ (Colossians 2:12), for:

John 4:23-24 New King James Version (NKJV)

23 But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship Him. 24 God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.”

So we must come to God in spirit not the flesh. So in confessing with the mouth that Christ is Lord and he overcame death through resurrection (Romans 10:9-10) we are saved, but if you want to establish a covenant with God that allows you to truly benefit in his promise this requires sacrifice (Psalms 50:5).

Again test this, is it not written:

Romans 12 New King James Version (NKJV)
Living Sacrifices to God
12 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.


Why Does God Do This?

1 Peter 1:6-7 New King James Version (NKJV)
6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been [a]grieved by various trials, 7 that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, 

Our faith is all about relationship with God. God wants to know that you are serving Him not because of the promises of abundance, but out of love for God, for God is love (1 John 4:8). 

So if like me you were wondering, why is this happening to me? For what is this season of suffering. Take heart knowing you are not alone, that your suffering has a purpose and a blessing at the end of it. That God loves you and knowing all things wants you to endure that renew your heart and mind towards Him. 

That when you come to serve it is for relationship and not for reward.

                                          

He Is Risen! Do you want a new start?

Matthew 28:6 New King James Version (NKJV)

6 He is not here; for He is risen, as He said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay.

Rejoice for He Is Risen!

Previously I wrote about the sadness you can feel on Good Friday, understanding the humiliation and pain Jesus suffered on his way to, and on, the cross.

But that wasn't the end of the story....Celebrate for He Is Risen!

Yet...why should we celebrate? If you are new to faith you may not know what He did for us on the cross, or why His resurrection is significant:

Romans 6:4-9 New King James Version (NKJV)

4 Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.

5 For if we have been united together in the likeness of His death, certainly we also shall be in the likeness of His resurrection, 6 knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be [a]done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin. 7 For he who has died has been [b]freed from sin. 8 Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him, 9 knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, dies no more. Death no longer has dominion over Him.

2 Corinthians 5:17 New King James Version (NKJV)

17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

Jesus died that we may be reconciled with the Father and have a new beginning. 

Often times in life, people relocate to different homes, towns, or even countries for a fresh start; I have done the same when I was younger. Before I left my father told me: "Be careful when you are trying to have a new start, that you are not bringing old problems. Make sure what you are really not trying to run away from is you."

This is so true. I have made plenty of mistakes in life, but I thank Jesus that He saw me through, even before I really knew Him! Maybe you're feeling like you are coming out the other side, or perhaps you still in the midst of the storm, where you are still dealing with some of the consequences of some previous decisions. 

God loves you just as you are. You haven't made a mistake too terrible for Him to redeem. Jesus came for you too. He does not require you to do anything before you come to Him.

Maybe you're tired of your current situation, feel like you're in a rut, or you know its time for to make a change. Jesus gave the world hope and a new beginning in the resurrection. The good news? 

You can have a new start too.

Below is a simple and effective prayer to make Jesus the Lord of your life and have a new beginning. When you do, take the time to meditate and truly believe in Him and His power. 

Then say out loud:

Lord Jesus,

I believe in the resurrection,

I believe that you rose again,

Come into my heart,

I repent of my sin,

I make you my Lord and Saviour.

Amen.

(Scripture to back this up)

Romans 10:9-10 New King James Version (NKJV)

9 that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.

Understand that Jesus lives on the inside of us, who believe in Him. He is eternal and alive and well today, touching lives just as He did when He was incarnate on earth. 

If you did as the scripture says and prayed that simple prayer, you have started your walk of faith.

Congratulations!

Download a free Bible app like YouVersion or any you prefer; maybe you prefer a hard copy? Get a Bible at your local bookstore. Pray that God that He leads you on this walk and He will guide you faithfully.

Glory to God! Hallelujah! Praise His name for it is worthy to be praised!

God's Perfect Timing: My Imperfect Frustration

(Written in real time as I am going through it)

Today has been a very trying day - and its not over yet!  For 6 weeks I have been waiting on the fulfillment of one of God's promises to me. The hour is coming and now is (see what I did there...).

He has told me this promise is to "imminently" come to pass. The trouble with using the word "imminently" is that its HIS word, used to increase MY expectation (so that I am waiting in faith, not doubt as doubt leads to unbelief) but waiting upon HIS timing. I don't think I need to mention how God's timing, definitely is NOT, the same as your timing. This is torture.

Wait on the Lord ; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord !
Psalms 27:14 NKJV

I feel like the word "courage" should be double underlined, bold, in neon colours, pulsating with an accompanying GIF. God told me to be still and know He is God, he has instructed me not to work during this time, for six weeks  this has now been the case.

Whilst I am still renewing my mind its hard to watch as bills come due, my bank account being empty, direct debits bouncing, food is dwindling (I mean is God telling me I could lose a few pounds? It's getting serious out here!), the cash in my hand is dwindling to nought and God is choosing now as a time to test my faith.

There is nothing about my present circumstance that says God is just about to come through and despite all of this my spirit is expectant......but my flesh is frustrated, anxious, hungry, wanting to take control of the situation.

Wanting to disobey God.

What I am experiencing is exactly what is stated in Galatians 5:

For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.
Galatians 5:17 NKJV

So now I know this is what is happening, and I cannot stress to you how hard this is, what exactly am I going to do about it?

I have learnt from my mistakes in the past, and I want whoever is reading this to pay close attention. Whatever you feed at this moment is going to determine if you are going to remain walking by faith, or slip into the flesh and fall short of your blessing.

So right now, as you are feeling frustrated.

Feed. The. Spirit.

Turn to the word. This is why it is good to be armed with the word of God memorise it, and it you're not there yet just know what to search for.

I am pasting these in real time, because I am ministering to myself, if you find this useful let me know in the comments/add your more verses:

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.
Hebrews 10:23 NKJV
God let me know about the power of faith confessions, but furthermore, holding fast to those confessions, for He is faithful and He will come through for me.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding;
Proverbs 3:5‭ NKJV
This is saying trust me, trying to operate by what you see and understand is making you nervous.

Be still, and know that I am God;
Psalms 46:10 NKJV
Relax, know that God has this under control.

I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:12‭-‬13 NKJV
This is a growing point. I'm not here yet but I need to learn how to be content whatever the circumstance. But that last sentence is power, if you find yourself in this situation saying that out loud is so powerful. I can do all things through Christ who strenghthens me.

So he answered and said to me: “This is the word of the Lord to Zerubbabel: ‘Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,’ Says the Lord of hosts. ‘Who are you, O great mountain? Before Zerubbabel you  shall  become a plain! And he shall bring forth the capstone With shouts of “Grace, grace to it!” ’ ”
Zechariah 4:6‭-‬7 NKJV
This is telling me switch your perspective, the mountain before me shall become a plain by the Spirit of God. My God is bigger than my problem!

Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Hebrews 12:1‭-‬2 NKJV
Look to Jesus for strength, on this race of endurance.

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.
James 1:2‭-‬4 NKJV
Thank God for the trial and the work He is doing in me. Amen!

This is a journey, this is hard, I don't pretend to understand it or understand God, but what I can tell you is if you ever find yourself stuck like me, feed the Spirit. Turn to God not away from Him. Use every tool and resource He gave you to overcome and stay in obedience.

I hold fast to my confession. I believe the blessing is around the corner. I believe I will make it, even if I am a few pounds lighter by the time I get there.

Psalms 51:1-2 : Why Feel Guilt?

At first glance the meaning of this verse is simple enough, but it ministered to me in an unexpected way before I wrote this post. I previously wrote about the benefits of meditating on the word, and I encourage all believers to do so. It will make the word come alive.

This verse takes me back before my journey began, when in my ignorance of the faith, I saw Christians as judgemental, always looking to elevate themselves for their "righteousness" and look down upon me with condemnation for my "sin". 

I saw God as unjust. I would say things like "Why would I want to serve a God that is always reminding me of my sin?", "I mean these are his rules anyway, what kind of God makes a human who can sin, then demands that they don't? Isn't that just setting me up for failure?". In short I didn't see my sin as some "great transgression" that I should seek compassion and forgiveness for. I was generally a good human being, I didn't commit any crimes, was generally nice to people. I thought I was doing just fine by myself.

Therefore, I was incapable of feeling any guilt for my sin, I just didn't see an issue.

I wonder how many of you are in this place right now reading this? Having seen this verse you are still on that place of your journey asking these type of questions?

To those people I would like to confess something. As I write this now, this to me, is one of the most powerful verses that can minister to my everyday life.

When you decide to make Jesus Christ the Lord of your life, and take that initial step of faith, you will have to give up on some things. Faith in Lord Jesus, that He is the son of God, that the trinity is real, that the Father is the God of all creation, is the beginning of your journey. From there comes the next part which is relationship. God always knew you, but you have only just come to know Him, and you will have to get to know God.

As your relationship with God grows, you'l become aware of all the things He has done, not just in the Bible, for you. 
Personally. 
You will come to know how good He is, how for everything that He has done, does and will do for you; He requires very little in return:

Deuteronomy 10:12 New King James Version (NKJV)

12 “And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God require of you, but to fear the Lord your God, to walk in all His ways and to love Him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul,

Knowing He will work all things for Your good because you love Him (Romans 8:28). There are so many verses about how good God is when we obey that I couldn't list them all here, but God is faithful, and He wants to bless us. 

Understand I am saying all of this and I've only really been born again 3/4 months! When you realise how good God is for us, working all things for our good, blessing us, being patient and so much more; you will feel a tremendous amount of guilt when you let Him down. 

You will learn about that character of God, I am still learning believe me, but what I can tell you is that He is forgiving, compassionate, patient, gracious, merciful and so much more! Yes we will let God down but He gives us hope, that as long as our heart is for Him and we have faith, He gives us grace.

God does not want you to feel condemned. I realised that on my journey, those were flawed human beings that made me feel that way and not representative of God. 

God wants you to seek Him. 

God doesn't want you to sin, for your own good.

So seek God with all your heart, stay in faith and be encouraged knowing that God sees that your trying and His mercy endures forever! (Psalms 136).